So me, Theresa Wolff, ate major shit the other day. I am the first person to successfully fall down the entire flight of stairs at our apartment. I swore it would be a drunken Amy, but alas, it was I. It's ok tho, I managed to walk away with a slight case of whiplash and a large ecchimosis (bruise) on my right sholder blade. At least I got some muscle relaxers out of the deal.

Yesterday I went to the horrible Don Vito thing at the even more horrible Screwy Louies. I swear, things I do to see the friends I never see. I managed to convince Miles that we should get the fuck out of there as fast as humanly possible and we hightailed it down to the Zephyr, where I proceeded to get drunk. Not too drunk tho, just drunk enough to not give a fuck. When I got there, I had a lovely story waiting for me about my boyfriend who just had diarrhea in an alleyway. With a picture to boot! What I lucky girl I am. Swoon...