So I feel icky again. I can't stop thinking about Greg. I know that is to be expected, but I don't like this shit. I feel, for the first time in my life, I am fighting depression. I mean genuine kicking and screaming fistacuffs (gotta love that word). I don't want this to happen, and even though since I was 13 years old, bad shit and death have surrounded me, I really feel defeated. I'm waving the surrender white flag over here. I refuse to give in though, I have too much to be thankful for. I have an awe inspiring boyfriend, and an unbelievably supportive family. Not to mention a beautiful and caring group of friends. I don't want this to be happening. Sometimes I feel that I am cursed. I've got the Wolfman curse. No matter what I do, something always happens. Like the morning I found out Greg died, I shit you not, I was driving to work super happy, it was beautiful out, and I had a great morning, I was thinking geez I'm happy, now all I need is for someone to die. My phone rang not five minutes later with the news. WTF???!!!
I hope this passes. Like every rough spell in my life, it should pass. It's just particularly difficult this time. Grrrr...
On the bright side, I just ordered the cutest espridrilles (shoes, assholes) from Urban Outfitters. For 20 bones nonetheless. Shopping makes me feel better. And seeing my bf, which I will be doing in about 1 hour. Toodles...
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